I'm not very much in the spirit.

How am I supposed to get in the mood to decorate for Christmas when Mother Nature has misplaced her seasons schedule? We have completely skipped over Winter, and have gone straight to Spring. I'm not really complaining because I certainly enjoy these beautiful days in the yard. I'm just saying - it's not beginning to look (or feel) a lot like Christmas at all.

Edited to add: Yes, I understand the consequences of such a wish. I know I will regret this wretched hex I have just put upon myself and the good people in my part of the country. When the temperatures drop below freezing and the snow has fallen up to our necks, I will mourn for this day.

My proud hunter.

Apparently we will be mounting the head of this poor creature in our home once it has been properly preserved. Because my husband must feel that nothing is more comforting than lounging around on a Sunday morning being stared at by the glassy, lifeless eyes of a deer carcass.

Into the garbage chute, flyboy.

Well, today the kids and I were so productive. We each claimed our spot in the family room and played LEGO Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy on our new Xbox. Once we succeeded in each developing carpal tunnel syndrome, we put down the controllers and, continuing with our theme, watched the Original Star Wars Trilogy on DVD. It was true bliss.

Frozen pits of hell.

So this morning... my deodorant was nowhere to be found. I dug through the closet in the bathroom, desperately hoping that I had a spare tube somewhere. I did not find exactly what I was looking for, but I found deodorant nonetheless. The aerosol spray kind. I hesitated. Lifted the first arm. Cringed. Sprayed. And screamed! I think this type of torture was invented by the Nazis. It was like applying liquid nitrogen directly to my pits. Anyone who sees me today should thank me. I sprayed my second arm, solely for the innocent bystanders that I may come in close contact with today.

You're welcome.